Saturday, March 1, 2014

True Love



Many people have asked this question and many scientists have searched for the answer. It is one of those unexplained phenomena that stumps those that only believe in things that are scientifically proven. I, for one, have watched far too many romance movies and have read far too many romance novels. When making these fake ideals of love your own reality it is hard to expect less from a relationship.  No relationship I have had thus far has been perfect. They were nothing like the story of Cinderella and her prince or the amazing love stories portrayed in my favorite romance novels. 

A very wise friend of mine once told me that after five years the chemicals that caused you to be attracted to someone in the first place ware off and then instead of being deeply in love your relationship either ends or is morphed into a deep friendship with the occasional occurrence of sexual relations. 

True love is always something that I wanted to believe in. When I look around at all of the couples around me it makes it difficult to believe that true love is anything but a fantasy.  I do think that there is one perfect person out there for everyone, but the likelihood of you running in to that person is slim to none. You could spend your whole life looking for them and never find them. This does not mean that you will not fall in love. You will fall in love and it will happen many times.

My Dad always said that you marry the person you are dating when you are ready to get married. I think that this is true for most people. You are ready to get married you are in love and you get married. In an article written by John Harlow and Brendan Montague they discuss the fact that, in recent studies, scientists have done brain scans on couples that have been together for 20 years and a small percentage of those couples responded with as much passion as they did when they were first falling in love with each other.  They found that these couples have “love maps” that are a lot like that of animals that mate for life and that their relationship morphed into a more “Intensive companionship where they can experience more sexual liveliness.”

Basically, the article is saying that scientific proof of true love has been found, but it is still very rare in humans. It is something that most humans want and something that they strive for with every part of their being, but it is one of the rarest and beautiful phenomena on the earth and those that do find it are extremely lucky.  The other 85% of the world settles for an imperfect love that requires constant work, and there is nothing wrong with this, until they lose the motivation to work at it.
True love is a wonderful thing, and I hope that everyone who reads this finds it in its most perfect and beautiful form.

If you wish to read further on the topic:



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